I found a pair of glittery flower earrings on the carpet yesterday. Not mine, of course, I don't wear jewelry. My heart sank and I felt panicked."That bastard!" I thought. "He's been cross dressing without me..."

Then I remembered my niece stayed with us recently, and it makes more sense that the girly earrings belong to her. I think pearls are more Eugenio's thing.

I haven't written anything in awhile. I just stopped writing -- not in a journal, no long winded, spur of the moment email messages to myself, no cry for attention Facebook status updates, nada. I'm prone to documenting the constant stream of mind bullshit, so this no writing was odd for me. It wasn't a conscience decision, either. Once I realized I hadn't written in three days, I thought to myself, "Well, self, you should get back to writing down all these incredibly profound thoughts and feelings you're experiencing" but, for no explainable reason, I didn't. So here's to ending that streak. And in the vein of documenting fond memories....

My lovely niece came to visit us in Orlando this week. Her parents, also known as my sister and her husband, bought her a one way ticket to Orlando for her 12th birthday gift. Just kidding about the one way, but it's an idea I'm keeping in my back pocket for when I have a teenager. Happy birthday! We're sending you away!  We gave her  the Orlando Experience -- Disney, Universal, trip to the beach, soccer game, and then I brought her to work with me today, a sort of humbling after the Disney "dreams come true" nonsense. Now excuse me for a moment as I say something positive -- I've blogged before about how Disney World in the summertime is a truly miserable experience for all involved (the parents, the chubby legged toddlers, the Disney "cast members", everyone) -- but going on a dreary, rainy day is the smartest way to go. The rain cools the place down, the sun isn't blaring, which if you're pale and bound to age poorly like myself, is welcomed, and the park is less crowded because all the other idiots prefer to bake in the oven that is waiting with sweaty strangers for two hours in line for a 30 second ride. You're a tourist at a theme park, you're already going to look like shit, along with everyone else, so you might as well show up guns blazing -- head to toe poncho, umbrella, ugly tennis shoes, plastic bag over your purse -- and get your ride on as the other knuckle heads who didn't check the forecast, not to be confused with the idiots who prefer 110 degrees, duck for cover. We rode more rides and saw more shows in one day at Disney than I had been able to ride and see in my combined two sunny day trips in the past. So my first Unsolicited Tourist Advice was to stay home in the summer, but I'll amend that with: if you must grace us with your presence, do yourself a favor and pick a so called terrible weather day. I didn't set out to write an advice column here, but there you go, I can't help myself, I know everything; you're welcome...

Anyway, the real point is, I hope my niece had a blast. I think she did. I did. I'm thoroughly exhausted by fun and my digestive system is off kilter. Two days of fiber free theme park food does that. I can't wait to poop again.

Picture and caption taken from my sister, because she said it best:

To a great man, World War II vet, husband, teacher, father of to two amazing women, and my grandfather: your wit and musical talent far outlived your memory and your long battle with alzheimer's is now over; you will be missed.

A history lover and former teacher, he fittingly passed on the fourth of July.