Business in the front, party in the back

To add insult to injury, I decided to get my hair cut at the place Eugenio frequents for his monthly 2 minute hair trim. I wanted a cheap hair cut, and that's what I got. I wanted wispy, side-swept bangs, and I got a mullet. My bad hair cut turned tragic when I tried to fix it myself with regular scissors. Mara cuts her bangs, and they look nice, so I figured I could try the same. One "shit! fuck!" after another, I finally decided to cut my losses (haha). We went straight to the mall for a $40 hair cut. Well, first I ate. It's interesting how once I lessen my self-standards, I can throw all caution to the wind. I have an ugly hair cut, I might as well eat a big, fat, greasy burger.

"Yup. He did a doozy on these bangs," noted my new, chic hairstylist.

She did her best to make my manly mane look less so, and then added, "Now you just have to wait for it to grow." And, if I want, I can "come back in a week to get highlights for a discounted price." Lady, I have a mullet. I don't need highlights.

I feel bad for Eugenio. I took a look at my fabulous self in the mirror this morning, and all I could do was laugh. Thick bangs don't look purdy in the morn. That's how I should talk to match my hair. If I spend a long time licking and fixing my hair, I can almost look as if I'm going for Audrey Hepburn. But only for a second. If I move or breath, I go back to Joe Six Pack from way out yonder."I'll tell yew wut. My momma makes the best grits."

At least it didn't happen on my wedding day. Have you seen this classic You Tube video? Eugenio showed it to me while I was devouring my hamburger at the mall, before my hair pseudo-fix. Watch the whole thing. *So funny* Don't let me near scissors on my wedding day.

ANYHOO, I really don't care about my hair as much as it seems. Sure, I cry a little when I look in the mirror, but I do understand that there are people in this world with much bigger problems. (I heard Lindsey Lohan had to surrender her hair extensions before entering prison.)

wild hare

I woke up this morning at 4:45am and couldn't go back to sleep. So I did some reading, went to the apartment gym, ran on the treadmill, then went to Walmart to buy shampoo and conditioner, since I've been out for a couple days. The opposite wall in the shampoo isle is stacked with hair dye, so I impulsively decided to dye my hair dark brown. I've never dyed my hair in my life. In my head at 7am, it sounded like a fantastic idea. It was pretty cheap too, so I figured it was a worthy purchase.(Note to self: add hair dye to list of things not to buy because-it's-cheap).

It's a fun change for now, but I'm not thrilled about it. Thankfully, I was sane enough to buy non-permanent dye. I think I'll buy this dye again when Halloween comes around for a Morticia Addams costume.

Thoughts?