Monday, September 6, 2010

Business in the front, party in the back

To add insult to injury, I decided to get my hair cut at the place Eugenio frequents for his monthly 2 minute hair trim. I wanted a cheap hair cut, and that's what I got. I wanted wispy, side-swept bangs, and I got a mullet. My bad hair cut turned tragic when I tried to fix it myself with regular scissors. Mara cuts her bangs, and they look nice, so I figured I could try the same. One "shit! fuck!" after another, I finally decided to cut my losses (haha). We went straight to the mall for a $40 hair cut. Well, first I ate. It's interesting how once I lessen my self-standards, I can throw all caution to the wind. I have an ugly hair cut, I might as well eat a big, fat, greasy burger.

"Yup. He did a doozy on these bangs," noted my new, chic hairstylist.


She did her best to make my manly mane look less so, and then added, "Now you just have to wait for it to grow." And, if I want, I can "come back in a week to get highlights for a discounted price." Lady, I have a mullet. I don't need highlights.

I feel bad for Eugenio. I took a look at my fabulous self in the mirror this morning, and all I could do was laugh. Thick bangs don't look purdy in the morn. That's how I should talk to match my hair. If I spend a long time licking and fixing my hair, I can almost look as if I'm going for Audrey Hepburn. But only for a second. If I move or breath, I go back to Joe Six Pack from way out yonder."I'll tell yew wut. My momma makes the best grits."

At least it didn't happen on my wedding day. Have you seen this classic You Tube video? Eugenio showed it to me while I was devouring my hamburger at the mall, before my hair pseudo-fix. Watch the whole thing. *So funny* Don't let me near scissors on my wedding day.

ANYHOO, I really don't care about my hair as much as it seems. Sure, I cry a little when I look in the mirror, but I do understand that there are people in this world with much bigger problems. (I heard Lindsey Lohan had to surrender her hair extensions before entering prison.)

7 comments:

  1. Oh Hanna! I LOVE this blog. Why oh why aren't you writing a book? I really think you should. As for the hair...it grows! That's the great, fun, wonderful thing about it. Feb 12 is far, far away and as I recall, your hair grows super fast. :)

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  2. Calabazita you could have a mohawk and you would still looke beautiful. I think you look gorgeous as always.

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  3. Nicole -- That is such a compliment to me, you have no idea! AND I actually am writing a book! I've always wanted to, and since I have a lot of time on my hands while applying for jobs, I've been writing a novel for a couple of months now. It's much harder for me to write fiction, though, so I'm thinking about changing my focus. It's good inspiration for me hearing that you like my blog. My dream job is getting paid to write. : ) And yes, my hair, thank god, grows fast!

    Eugenio -- Why are you soooo sweet?! Gah, I love you! I might try a mohawk one day, to test that comment. ; )

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  4. awww I actually like it better than the pictures below. you look like the girl from gilmore girls with it like that

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  5. Your bangs look super cute, I'm sure the rest of your hair probably looks just as cute too. I also recently got a cheap crappy haircut. Thank god my hair grows fast. A good solution in the mean time is to curl it and pull it back in a lose pony tail or clip. It's a quick and classy style.

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  6. Curl the bangs and pull it back in a lose ponytail -- sounds like a plan. I'm going to try that. I've been stealing Eugenio's gel to sweap and keep my bangs angled to the side.

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  7. Curl all your hair, not just the bangs. lol. curly bangs and straight hair would look ...different. lol

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