With that, we packed up the hotel room, got on a plane to Orlando, and drove to Miami Beach the following day. The first night of our honeymoon was Valentine's Day. We made an early reservation, the only slot available, at Tantra, which I selected mostly because all the reviews described it as "erotic." I figured that would be a good start.
They totally played up the sexy, erotic vibe. The waitresses at Tantra were all hot and wore tight, short red dresses with heals. We were seated at a red couch in a room so dark that we needed flashlights to see the menus. I get it, everyone looks wonderful when your drunk and the lights are off. Nevermind what we ate -- yes, it was good and expensive. We drank a delicious, sweet bottle of champagne (Something Imperial Nectar -- I requested another bottle for my birthday) and washed it down with a bottle of red wine. I've never made it to the bottom of four glasses of anything alcoholic without puking, and this wasn't an exception.
Sauced and stuffed, we went back to our swanky hotel where I attempted to look sexy with my food baby. Eugenio navigated through the stringy lingerie, yadi yadi yada, and ten minutes later, with a tornado in my stomach, I was throwing up all that expensive wine and champagne. Eugenio politely closed the bathroom door behind me, got in bed, and continued to bombard me with farts throughout the night. What a cute couple we are.
The rest of the honeymoon was relaxing and fun -- we basically hung out on the beach and the hotel pool during the day and ate like kings at night. One morning Eugenio went running with me on the beach, which I loved. Running on the beach was a difficult workout with ridiculous/pleasant scenery and background noise(waves crashing and seagulls singing). I enjoy South Beach when no ones around, like in winter, and hope to go back with Eugenio someday soon.
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